Why do women expect men to pay for dates?
Obviously not all women expect it, but there are a lot of women who do. Even if they don’t most men will pay for it regardless. I personally think it’s more of a traditional ritual than anything, passed on from generation to generation. Before the age of feminism and women’s liberation, women weren’t really allowed to work outside of their homes, at least not for a wage and therefore did not have any money to spend of their own – men were expected to be the providers. So when it came to courting women, men were obligated to pay for everything since he had a job and means to money that she didn’t. As time passed on and more women started joining the workforce, paying for dates became some sort of a “manly” thing to do, not manly as in macho or obligated to do so but more in the sense that it is only something men are supposed to do like peeing standing up (best example I could come up with since I couldn’t think of anything else considering women can do pretty much everything men can nowadays.) So in a sense it showed weakness and lack of economic sense if the man didn’t pay for the date.
Of course there are other reasons as well like culture and chivalry. Some women come from cultures where the traditional roles are still in play. Many men still hold ‘traditional values’ and if they are not capable of ‘providing’, they might believe they are less of a man.
Many people also feel they have a sense of responsibility to pay if they’re the ones who did the asking.
Then there is the thing about nurture and nature.
Suppose you just found a dollar on the ground, would you just ignore it and walk away? Most people wouldn’t. Similarly, if you had the choice between paying or not paying, which would you choose? (If you insist on paying, good for you. If not, that’s okay it’s normal. The sad truth is that all human beings are influenced by greed otherwise the concept of money wouldn’t exist.)
Women are given these choices way too often and being raised in this kind of environment results in many of them being spoiled. Though we fight for equal opportunities and most of them are beginning to get it, but when given the opportunity for them to haggle for more it’s only human nature for them to do so.
So basically, taking in all these factors
- Pride compels men to ‘show’ they can support. (And they bring themselves into an endless cycle of trying to impress women with their ability to support.)
- The more support women receive, the less they value the support. (Women are spoiled by these gestures.)
- Eventually, women get the idea that these supports should be taken for granted.
- When men suggest women should also contribute, different opinion leads to dispute.
Ultimately it all comes down to tradition, it’s hard to resist it when it has rooted itself so deep into society’s clutches. Although I think nowadays there are just as many couples that either split the bill or one pays for this date and the next time the other picks up the tab.